University Life, Part One: The Pros

I chose to come to university mostly because I didn’t know what else to do. That sounds like a bad way to make such an important decision, but I had no idea what job I wanted to do – besides, the idea of getting a job terrified me. There were no apprenticeships in anything that would suit me. There were, however, degrees that would suit me. I figured, if I do a degree I enjoy, then surely that will lead me into a career I enjoy.

So, whether it was the best choice or not, I went to uni.

And let me tell you something: I am so glad I did. Sure, there are some things that haven’t gone as I’d hoped and things that I wasn’t expecting to be problems (more on that in another post), but on the whole, university has so far been a fabulously beneficial experience for me.

For starters, remember how I said the idea of getting a job terrified me? Well, so did the idea of leaving home and going to uni. But the thing is that, at uni, everyone is the new kid. You’re shoved together in your halls and your lectures, and nobody knows each other and everybody is probably just as terrified as you are, whether they show it or not. It’s a new start, a new experience, surrounded by new people.

That’s several advantages in one. In school, you have a limited number of friends: of all the people of your age in your local area and who are in some of the same classes as you, you have to find the most agreeable ones. At uni, though, there are people from all walks of life, and in both classes and societies, you all end up classified by interests. Whether it’s a mutual passion for your degree subject or for a certain hobby, these are people you actually have something in common with. These are people you can be yourself with. And because they’re new people and it’s a new start, you can feel free to be whoever you want to be. I, for example, took this new start as the perfect chance to turn vegetarian.

Speaking of feeling free, leaving home to go to university gives you a whole new sense of independence. You get to come and go as you please. You get to make whatever food you like at whatever time you like. You can spend time with whoever you want for as long as you want. For me, this has taught me things about myself I didn’t even know. I have discovered that I love experimenting with food and trying new things, even though I’ve always been quite a picky eater. I’ve also realised that I have a tendency to try and do things on my own, without asking for help – and consequently, that this isn’t always a good thing, and that it can feel good (and totally not as scary as I thought it would be!) to share my thoughts, plans and ideas with others.

I see uni as a stepping stone to adult life: you've moved out of your parents' house, but you're not living on your own yet. You have to cook and clean for yourself, but you're with other people who are also learning how to do that. You have to budget your money and your time, but you have the support of the uni - personal tutors, advisers, and other welfare staff - to fall back on if you need help. It's a safe space to learn to be independent and grow your confidence so that you're ready for the adult world.

On top of that, there’s an awful lot of opportunities that university has to offer. Be it internships, research projects, semesters abroad – there’s more chance for CV improvement than just your degree. Plus, it’s an absolute confidence booster. When I signed up to be on the committee of the Creative Writing Society last year, I wanted to help, in some way, to improve a society that I saw so much potential in. But I was terrified of adding extra responsibilities to my studies; I just wanted to do something small. Now, though, I’m taking almost complete responsibility for the anthology we’re putting together, and I’m helping to organise the writer’s retreat weekend we have planned. I've made phone calls, I've promoted the society to strangers, and I've even led some of our writing sessions - which means talking to an entire group of people at once. It’s more responsibility than I imagined I would have, but it’s showing me what I am actually capable of when I push myself out of my comfort zone!

All this independence and confidence boosting has ultimately shown me that the Big Wide World is not as scary as it sounds. Thanks to my involvement with the Creative Writing Society, I have an idea for what I career I want to go into after I get my degree. And more impressively, considering how scary I found it before, I’m actually looking forward to life after university.

But university isn't all positives, and its pressures are another reason why I'm looking forward to leaving. And if you're reading this while wondering whether university is for you, you'll need the full picture - not just the benefits - before you decide. So, here is my post on the cons of university life.

The Redwood Rebel: Book Review

The Redwood Rebel by Lorna George, published in 2015, is the first in the Redwood War trilogy. It follows the story of Naomi, a young soldier from the land of Ffion who, after being imprisoned for four years, makes a deal for her freedom in the hopes of eventually freeing her country from the tyrannical princess leading it to its own destruction. However, it's not long before her plan goes terribly awry and she ends up not only fighting for her life but doing so in a difficult and unexpected situation (no spoilers!).

I first came across Lorna George on tumblr, where she was promoting her book before it was even published. I heard it was a book with dragons and strong female characters, so needless to say, I was very excited to read it when I finally got my hands on a copy at Christmas.

I'd like to say that I wasn't disappointed, but I'd also like to be honest. I really wanted to fall head over heels in love with this book. I wanted it to be my new favourite - after all, it has dragons and strong female characters; what more could one possibly want from a book? Especially when the protagonist is possibly one of the strongest female characters I've come across? Naomi is not only an ex-soldier but also extremely well educated and written very realistically. She's stubborn and knows her own mind and isn't afraid to voice her opinion. And she's not the only well-developed character, thank goodness. Our other protagonist is just as stubborn and flawed as she is (no Mary Sues here, thank you very much!).

The thing I think I loved best about this book was its worldbuilding. Naomi spends a lot of time with a group from another of the two continents in Ilios, the world where The Redwood Rebel is set (I won't say which so I don't spoil it for anyone), and there are a lot of cultural differences. There is a huge divide between the views and mindsets of one nation and those of the other, and that's something I'm not I've seen before. It made for a very developed world, not to mention plenty of conflict as characters from different backgrounds argue over the right way to do things. It also led to numerous discussions on consent which of course was fabulous.

So, then, you may ask: how can you possibly be disappointed with this book in the slightest?
Sure, the characters were great, but that doesn't mean I connected with them that well. There were a lot of long internal monologues which described what our characters were feeling and thinking and pretty much every reason behind those thoughts and feelings. Counter-intuitively, I felt that this not only slowed down the plot but also distanced me from the characters. I felt I never got chance to get to know them, because I was just told about them instead. I'd heard Naomi mentioned so many times, I was really looking forward to meeting her, so I was disappointed that it didn't really feel like I'd met her - rather, it felt more like I was hearing about her from a friend.

But having said that, I have no doubt that The Redwood War series will only get better from here. I still definitely recommend reading The Redwood Rebel especially if you're looking to read something with dragons in, or a progressive fantasy. I can't wait to read the next installment!

Editing Others' Writing

A while ago, I talked a bit about what I want from people reading my writing, which is mostly just a vast amount of incredibly detailed opinions. Over the past week or two, I've been trying to apply this to my own reviews of other people's work in giving feedback for the entries to the Creative Writing Society's upcoming anthology.

I'm not going to lie: it's not easy. At first I felt very awkward giving feedback to my peers - some of whom I knew personally, and some of whom were older and therefore more experienced in both life and (presumably) in writing than me. I felt like I was in no position to comment on anything they'd written; I felt like I'd arbitrarily given myself authority to criticise them just because I was on the committee, even though of course my writing is no better than any of theirs. So I made sure that everyone knew I wasn't trying to tell them what to do, and they could ignore all my opinions if they wanted. Reminding myself that I was just giving an outside perspective also helped. But even once I'd gotten that out the way, I still had misgivings. In trying to be constructive I often felt like I was just insulting their work, and I spent most of my time staring out the window trying to work out how to word something nicely, or whether it was worth mentioning at all.

The more I edited, though, the easier it got. I've given feedback on nine pieces now, and I suppose you could say I've worked out a bit of a system. First, I'll do a casual read-through, often at a time when I'm not planning to actually sit down and give any feedback yet. At this point, I'm reading the piece mostly out of curiosity, and for enjoyment. I won't think about it that much, I'll just read it. Often, I don't find much to criticise at this stage; everything seems fine.

When I come back to it, I give it another read through, being more critical this time but not making any comments yet. After that, I'll read it through as many times as I think I need to, annotating specific details, and making any more general comments in the email to which I attach the annotated document to send back to the writer.

There are a few things I make sure to look for and point out in both my annotations and general comments. The first thing is the good points. If there's a line or a paragraph or a word choice I particularly like, I let the writer know, and I try to tell them why I like it, too. In my general comments, I always start on a positive, too. This, I feel, not only balances out the review but also encourages them; nothing better than a nice compliment on your work to make you want to improve it even further. It also lets the writer know what not to change as well as what to change.

Secondly, I consider the theme or the take-home message of the piece. For the writer, this is mostly in their head; no matter what they put on the page, they know what they're trying to say, even if the two would not seem related to an outsider. That is, their overall meaning can get lost in winding sentences and trying to make this line rhyme with that line. So as well as looking at specifics I make sure to look at the overall piece to see whether its structure makes sense, whether the point of the piece is clear, and whether every part fits with this. I feel like giving a piece a clear theme or message gives it direction, which just makes it much more rewarding - not to mention easier - to read.

In pieces which have characters (some, like the essays and the poems, do not have characters), I make sure to look at them in great detail and outline for the writer how I perceive each character so they can check whether the character is coming across how they intend them to. For one piece, this meant going back through the piece an extra five times, looking at a different character each time.

To my relief, I've heard only good things from the writers who have got back to me after receiving my feedback so far. The next step I've suggested is for us all to swap our second drafts to get multiple viewpoints on them, then hopefully they'll be ready for printing!

New Semester Resolutions

     In the midst of writing essays and revising for the January exam period, I forgot to make New Year’s resolutions this year. Not that it really matters: I always think there are many opportunities for new starts apart from New Year. For me, one of those is a new semester. Deadlines and the stress they bring are gone for now, allowing time for other commitments such as self-improvement. Plus, with new modules under way, a new semester seems like the perfect time to become a new version of oneself.

     I’m not making resolutions as such, but there are many things I’d like to start doing, better habits I’d like to get into, this semester. One of them, as always, is to be more organised. This time, I’m going to stay on top of filing my lecture notes and I’m going to make sure to give myself plenty of time to not only complete but also perfect my assignments. I’m also going to watch the German news every night and watch more German films, to keep up my language skills; I might even sign up for German conversation classes, as I don’t feel I speak enough in seminars. And I’m going to do it all with positivity and motivation to spare.

     But that’s not all. I’m going to be a lot more involved in my university’s Creative Writing Society this semester, and that’s not so much something I’ve decided to do myself as something I’m already doing. I signed up to the Creative Writing Society committee last year as the “Editor”, which so far in this academic year hasn’t involved much, so I’ve basically just been doing odd jobs that other committee members are too busy to do. Now, however, the anthology we’re putting together is gaining momentum, and this is pretty much entirely my domain. I’ve been promoting the anthology to the Society’s members; I’ve been reviewing all the entries we’ve had so far so their authors can improve them*; I’ll be going to talk to the head of the School of English Literature, Language and Linguistics to see if the School will support and advertise our project as well as get us more writers; I’ll be organising feedback sessions for the writers to read and comment on each others’ work; and when they send me their final submissions, I’ll be formatting the whole thing for printing. 

     On top of all that, I’ve volunteered to help out with some of the other things Creative Writing is doing at the moment, which goes from the running of our usual writing sessions and social events to the organising of a writers’ retreat weekend at the end of the Easter break in mid-April. All in all, I feel like being part of this society’s committee is going to be incredibly hectic for me over the next couple of months, but the success of this society is something I’m very passionate about, and right now I feel like my enthusiasm will be more than capable of making up for any time, energy or sleep I end up lacking.

     Finally, I hope to spend at least ten minutes every day working on my own writing project (come this summer I’ll have been writing this novel for four years, and I’d very much like to finish it before I die), and I’m also aiming to start updating this blog regularly – every Friday, to be exact. I’ll be posting updates on my writing, updates on the Creative Writing Society, other writing-related bits and pieces, book reviews, and maybe even a short story or two. If you’d like more frequent updates, I’ll be posting shorter posts and occasionally some pictures on my tumblr blog.

     I know it seems like a lot for one girl to do while keeping herself alive and healthy, attending lectures and maintaining some semblance of a social life, but I feel like I’m in a much better place mentally and emotionally this year compared to last year**, so I think I can cope. Plus, I feel a challenge is what I need. What better way to stay focussed than to always have something to focus on? What better way to get oneself out of bed in a morning than to have so many goals to achieve? Of course, I can only hope that this doesn’t backfire; this is supposed to result in productivity and fulfilment, not stress and an impulse to hide from everything under my duvet. If this is a success, then I’m hoping it’ll set me in positive, productive habits for the rest of my life.

     On that note, let the whirlwind that is this semester begin!

*=I’m planning on writing a blog post on editing others’ work, so look out for that in the near future.

**=There were points last year when even the prospect of leaving my room to go to a lecture seemed like far too much pressure, never mind making an appointment with the head of the School of English Literature, Language and Linguistics.

Electric Reads Young Writers' Anthology 2015

Back in August, I came across a post on Facebook advertising a short story competition run by a company called Electric Reads. They were looking for British writers under the age of 25 to write a 3,000-word or less piece in any genre to be published in an anthology to showcase new talent. So I wrote a short fantasy story, which isn't something I often do (world-building gets a little difficult when you only have a limited amount of words to tell the story in). I was pretty pleased with the result, however, so I sent it to a friend for editing purposes. They basically told me they'd eat their hat if my piece wasn't chosen.

So I made the changes they suggested (and a few of my own) and submitted it. I was hopeful, but I wasn't really expected much.

Then, in early November, I got this email.

On the 11th of December, after several weeks of edits and preparations, the anthology was released worldwide! My story is one of only 25 to be selected and I am incredibly proud of this achievement. I haven't yet read the other stories (my copy only arrived yesterday!) but judging by the dedicated hard work the team at Electric Reads has put into this anthology, I know they'll have chosen some absolutely fantastic stories.

The Electric Reads Young Writers' Anthology 2015 is available from Amazon in eBook, hardback and paperback here, from Barnes & Noble in eBook here, and from Waterstones in hardback here. As young, uestablished writers, this is a huge opportunity for us to get our names out there so it would be amazing if you could support us by reading our stories and - even better - posting a review on any of the aforementioned sellers' sites, or on our Goodreads page. :)

Writer's Block

Recently I started sending chapters of my novel to a group of people I call my Guinea Pigs. In actuality, these are just my closest friends – the people I trust the most and feel most comfortable sharing my work with at this stage. However, it’s not easy, and for me, this editing seems to have brought on what many people refer to as writer’s block.

But before I get into that, let’s see where I’m at with this novel of mine. I did, miraculously, manage to complete Camp NaNoWriMo this past July (see my stats here), but in doing so I did not get anywhere near finishing the first draft of my sequel. I got so stuck with it that I decided it would be both easier and more beneficial for my writing if I were to instead write the second draft of my first draft (also my laptop spent six days out of my reach having a virus removed, so by the time I got it back, I had to write FAST, which I really couldn’t do with the amount of inspiration I was getting for the sequel). So, at the end of July’s Camp NaNoWriMo, I had a complete mess of a beginning of a sequel, and the first four chapters of the second draft of the first book.

Since then, I have edited the prologue plus one of those first four chapters and sent both off to my Guinea Pigs. After editing Chapter One about a week ago, however, I got writer’s block.

I say that like it struck me like lightning and I had to spend the week in bed with flu-like symptoms because of it. Of course, that is not the case. Writer’s block is not a disease; it affects different writers in different ways and for different reasons, and it won’t even be the same for each writer every time they get it. See this tumblr post for more on this.

In the past, I’ve had writer’s block from simply being uninspired. This time, though, it was decidedly anxiety-induced.

After sending Chapter One out to my Guinea Pigs, I started editing Chapter Two, but I couldn’t finish for the feeling of impending doom lying heavy on my shoulders. It suddenly struck me just how long a project this was, and how serious it was getting: I was writing draft two, and sending it out for other people to read! It is very rare for me to ever have finished a writing project, and I’ve certainly never gone back and completely rewritten one before, so this is the closest I’ve ever been to having a manuscript that is ready to send out to agents. This thought brought on even more fear: if I can’t deal with having my closest friends reading my writing, how will I ever be able to cope with getting anything published? What if I can’t achieve my lifelong dream?

It didn’t really help that I can be a bit of a perfectionist, and was worrying over whether any of this was worth my time anyway if it would never be perfect. Just thinking of continuing writing makes me want to hide from the world and all my responsibilities.

I decided the best way to overcome this was to take a break for a few days, and not force myself to write when I felt unable to do so. I've ended up consciously taking over a week off from writing my novel (I say "consciously" because often I just won't find time to write for this length of time or longer). On one hand, I could say that it has worked: when I do think about it (no use thinking about something that makes you feel like crap, right?), I feel a little better about it, and I have started writing again. On the other hand, what I have been writing is not my novel, and even if it was, this would definitely not be a permanent solution. The anxiety only comes back and then I'd have to take another break lasting a week or two. It could take years to get this novel done in this way, never mind its sequels.

Another potential solution is outlined in this tumblr post. I don't think the problem described by the anonymous user who sent in the question is quite the same as mine, but it's similar enough that it's worth a try. The advice suggests asking yourself a few questions about your writing whose answers are meant to encourage you and rekindle a bit of self-belief. I think my answers to these questions are certainly something I need to remember whenever I feel discouraged about my writing: yes, I enjoy writing, therefore no, I do not think it's a waste of time. That reminder that I'm writing this more for my own pleasure than for a future career might be just what I need to get me out of my writer's block.

July Camp NaNoWriMo 2015: Mid-Month Update

This month, I'm working on the sequel to my novel, which is actually proving rather difficult due to some rather big plot changes at the end of the first book that I've planned but haven't written yet. What that means is that I don't know where this story is going: I can't work out what's going to happen to the characters when I haven't fully worked out what happened to them previously. Luckily, this book introduces some new characters who originated from stories that I first imagined a few years ago. But in including them in this book, I haven't abandoned their stories; instead, I've simply integrated them as subplots. Because I know where these subplots are going, I have been favouring writing these rather than my main plotline. Unfortunately, that does not mean I am keeping up with my word count: as shown by the graph above, I am nine thousand words behind schedule. That's pretty normal for me during NaNoWriMo, though, so the fact that I haven't given up yet is a good sign that I may well still finish on time.